I Spy

Standing in front of a wall covered in scarves, a lady asks, "Where are your scarves?" and then proceeds to look at me as if I'm the idiot when I point to the wall and respond, "There."

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Can I Steal Yours?

We are not allowed to let customers bring accessories into the fitting rooms due to a security issue. During a designer launch, I was hoping our managers would allow it to be an exception due to the traffic we would be receiving and we could just count the accessory in as if it were a clothing item.

She told me, "No."

I was left in the fitting room with no way of keeping track of each customer's accessories.

One of the more popular items was a belt the designer produced. Customers had initially grabbed belts not looking at what size they grabbed. When I asked them what size they had, they told me, "I don't know," and then proceeded to tell me the size they wanted. Having no method of keeping track, I was forced to give them what they asked even when I knew they were lying.

After a couple minutes of customers piling in with tons of accessories, it was evident that we must come up with an inventory system. I came up with the idea of taking our shopping bags and assigning them numbers and telling customers to tell us their number so we could hand them their bag of accessories. I knew the method would work from that point onward, but I didn't know what I could do when customers previous to that point would complain about missing accessories or wrong sizes. There were two other people working the fitting rooms. I prayed I wouldn't have to be the one to tell the customer we didn't have her items.

Of course that wouldn't happen.

She told me the items she had given us and I looked at the remaining accessories not placed in our bag system and wasn't able to find her items among them. I apologized and told her that customers must have taken it without me knowing. I said I couldn't do anything about it but that her best bet was to go out and see if there were more out on the sales floor. I knew she would be upset, but I didn't expect her to say this,

"Since you gave away my items, can I take someone elses?"

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

False Advertising

Every once in awhile when a guest designer produces a line for the store, my co-workers and I receive shirts that we have to wear opening weekend. For this particular designer, we had his name printed on our shirts. On opening day, the designer was very popular and thus sold out within the first couple of hours of the store's opening.

A couple hours later, a customer approached me and asked me where the designer line was. I informed her that we were sold out. She then proceeded to tell me that we shouldn't be wearing our shirts because it was "false advertising." I informed her that we were required by management to wear the shirts and if she had an issue with it, I would be more than happy to get a manager to speak with her. She stormed off, but wasn't done yet. She wanted the last word. So minutes later, she returned, glared at me and said,

"I don't buy any of your fake designer crap. I only buy REAL designer clothes."

That particular designer didn't have his own designer line before my store carried it. My store launched his first line.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Change of Subject

A mother wants to see how her daughter's clothes look on her in the fitting room. I politely inform her that she is allowed to wait outside her daughter's fitting room as she changes and her daughter can show her the clothes when she is dressed but that she is not allowed in the fitting room with her. It was store policy. I even brought over a stool she could sit in as she waited. As I am showing other customers to their rooms, I can hear her loudly complaining about not being able to enter the same room as her own daughter.

After several minutes, I fear she is interfering with the other customers' shopping experiences so I return to the upset mother, apologize for the inconvenience, and inform her that not only is it store policy that prevents me from allowing her to enter the same room, but that it was a fire safety hazard as well. I resume showing other customers to their rooms when I hear her change subjects to complain about how rude I was.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Can You Hear Me Now?

When I pick up the phone, I say, "Hi. This is [insert store name here]. I'm ... How can I help you?" When I worked at a music and video store that had "Records" and "Video" in the store name, I had customers that frequently asked me the following questions:

1. "Do you sell CDs?",
2. "Do you sell movies?", and
3. "Do you sell books?"

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Anger build up? Yea, you might want to fix that..

I work at a project-orientated store, which is fine until they want two people to run the entire store and stalk customers by asking them questions "they can't say no to." Yea..no. First of all half of the customers that come into the store don't speak English.
Here is an average customer encounter:

I approach the customer and ask in my sweetest voice ever, "Do you need help finding anything?"
Customer: "Yes."
Pause this scene..
at the moment I'm thinking, "Yes, I have something to do."
Play.
Me: "What can I do for you?"
Customer: "Yes." The customer proceeds to walk out of the store.

Yea, they didn't say no alright, but they didn't even know what the crap I was saying. The only thing I hear at the register is, "How much?"

Next.
Aside from worrying about touching jizzy jeans, which is more common than it ever should be, I also must guard the dressing rooms and now check everyone in. I'm completely for this because it helps me help the customer when needed. The entire time I was at the dressing rooms not a single item was stolen or missing (hurray! this is rare). Now, when I go on my 10 minute break my lazy managers (yes, there were two working) did nothing but stand at the register and talk. When I came back Dumbass #1 notices that there are two customers in the store known for stealing and tells me to "stall" them. Sure, I'm good at stalling. I stalled the hell out of the two girls, and followed them asking things like, "Oh we have this promotion here," or , "What style of jeans were you looking for?"
Of course the damage was done. The sensors were removed and never found from two t-shirts and the tags were laying in the dressing room. Great job.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

The Memory Game

I rang up a customer for a two-piece bathing suit set she wanted to buy. The bottom didn't have a tag and, usually, our tops are the same prices as our bottoms and so that's how I rang her up. She walked away and shortly returned with another tagged bathing suit bottom in hand, threw it at me and yelled at me about how I am trying to cheat her out of her money. I asked her what the problem was and she yelled at me saying I over-charged her for the bathing suit by $1. I apologized and told her that I could fix it. As I'm returning her money to her, she glared at me and proceeded to lecture me on how I should know the prices on everything we sell. We're the size of a two-story department store. We have well over a hundred different items that we sell. We get new shipments each week. She expects me to memorize the prices of all of them.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Size Matters

A customer wanted to try on a stack of our men's dress shirts. Our men's dress shirts are folded over a board and pinned for appearance. When taken apart, customers usually leave the pointy pins, tissue, and board all around the fitting room floor. To avoid a mess, I offered him a sample shirt he could try on to see if the size fits. He replied, "I know my size." Several minutes passed and he exits the room with every single shirt unwrapped. I asked if everything worked out for him. They didn't. Apparently, they weren't his size.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Good Role Model

As I was showing a mother and child to their fitting room, the mother asked where the bathroom was. I informed her that we didn't have one. I hang her clothes in the room, wait for her to enter, and close the door behind her. As I'm walking away, I hear her say to her son, "Use the potty in here. That lady was being mean to you." I couldn't believe she was being serious or that the child would listen -- she was and he did.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Jizz in My Jeans

Not only do we have a regular customer who adores creaming himself on our black denim, now apparently girls enjoy making messes with their . . . juices too. I was clearing out the fitting rooms and began folding jeans a girl had tried on. When I went to zip up the jeans I felt something wet. Looking closer at the jeans I noticed the entire crotch area was wet.
People are so nasty.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Everybody Poops

A customer asked where the bathroom was. I told her that we didn't have one, but she would be able to find one across the street. Upset, she stormed off. Moments later I hear a call over the Walkie, "Housekeeping, we need a clean up in the fitting room." She decided against crossing the street and instead took a dump in one of our fitting rooms.

This is why I Work 2 Rant.

Welcome!

Everyone has their stories to tell. Some of the best stories come from everyday activities. One everyday activity that consumes most of our time is the time we spend at work. With the economy the way it is, work is both a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing to be able to work and receive income yet a curse because of what monsters we encounter there.

These are our stories. This is our collection of nightmares that we are cursed to encounter because of where we work. Our only blessing is to rant, so we Work to Rant.

Welcome to Work 2 Rant.